A New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene report says that a flea and tick infestation at 19 Stuyvesant Oval has resulted in several Stuyvesant Town tenants becoming demented.Six months ago, tenants began seeing an extreme change in their neighbors' behavior but didn't think much about it. "The construction around here is enough to drive anyone mad," says Linda Von Testa, a resident of 19 Stuyvesant Oval. "But after they replaced the sidewalks for the third time in nine months and things got back to normal some people I saw in the building were still acting pretty weird."
Mrs. Von Testa says she has seen one neighbor in particular wandering the halls late at night, covered in scabs, pecking away at her laptop and drawing on the laundry room walls with her lipstick. She saw another tenant, also covered in scabs, acting as a doorman. All night long he opened the lobby door for tenants and drug dealers, seemingly in a trance. "It's a scary place...I keep to myself," Mrs. Von Testa admits.
After numerous calls to 311, officials from the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene came, collected the crazed tenants and brought them to a psychiatric ward for testing where it was determined they were suffering from dementia brought on by flea and tick bites. The building was inspected and fifty five of the apartments were found to be infested with the petite pests.
Initially, tenants thought squatters were to blame for the epidemic. The undesirable Stuyvesant Town building has been one of the hardest hit by the transient squatters who have filtrated their way into the complex in recent months due to the dangerously low occupancy rate.
The problem has been traced back to a tawdry madame who moved into the building and ran an escort service out of her apartment. Her clientele consisted mostly of Stuyvesant Town's day laborers, squatters, and management, all of whom contaminated the mistress's apartment with fleas and ticks.
Miss. Cacti Than-Soy, AKA the "Flea Madame" as the New York Post referred to her, was arrested last week and brought up on charges related to prostitution, drugs, racketeering, endangerment, and being a general nuisance. Her apartment is currently undergoing decontamination and will be available for market rate renters in September.
My doctor said I don't have dementia, but I undoubtedly have Dementieva Fever!
This explains the cause of some of the tenants' dementia, but it's still a mystery how Robert Tishman, Jerry Speyer, and Rob Speyer became so mentally ill, and why their behavior has now escalated into criminal insanity. Were they also visiting the "Flea Madam"?
Please note that those affected with dementia are always the rent stabilized tenants. Some say they their letters of protest to TISH-SPY, as they yearned for the old Stuy Town Flea Market, provoked old man Tishman to tell Bud Perrone, "Screw the ladybugs, if these MFers want a flea market, send them fleas." Bud, compliant as ever said, " that would be helpful entertaining and funny."
Oh, and pity the poor man who has delusions of having a doorman, even if it's himself. The flea bites led to confusion and he began to believe he was living in a New York luxury building and when he was unable to see the luxury, he created it himself in his flea-bitten way. A real Stuy Town hero, he is.
Fleas, ticks, bed bugs, roaches, mice, pressure walls, mystery charges on rent bills, no hot water, 3AM dumpsters, leaf blowers, garbage piles, lead paint, gang violence, college kids, it's really anyone's guess Lux.
Why, I think that Flea Madame is just trying to spread a little love. I believe she is concerned (or misconcerned) about her neighbors.
Gee, this sounds worse than the BEETLE infestation over in my apartment since day 1 of moving in at 635E14 this past June! Whatever you do, learn to live with those suckers as the exterminator will rifle through your kitchen and steal your food. Seriously. I'm missing a ton of organic pasta. There might even be bed bigs residing in our luxury wood floors – specifically, between the cracks that have developed since these buildings used to be projects. Woo-hoo luxury life!